Bad dream

I feel like I just want to wake up from a bad dream. I'm not comprehending right now how to deal with all the questions and emotions that seem to drown my mind. Can I just open my eyes and make it be over? God feels like right in the midst of it, yet so far away as well. I want to completely trust him . . . yet I feel afraid of what might be in store. Thankfully He has given me so many amazing family and friends. I feel like I would be in the looney bin without them. Most things that I once considered safe, secure, and real feel like sand slipping through my fingers. I keep hoping God is there catching things from below.